Thursday, June 14, 2018

Rich People Can Be Sad

When I opened Facebook last Friday morning, the status of one of my friends read "Don't turn on CNN".

In the comment below, it said "Dear God, not Anthony Bourdain."

Dear God, indeed.  I am not usually one to get upset about the death of a celebrity, as I'm practical and recognize that there are vastly more important things to worry about right now, but I fucking loved Anthony Bourdain.  He was sexy and unapologetic and smart and absolutely obsessed with food.  He was the stereotypical entitled white male, and I should have hated him based on my usual patterns, but I didn't.  Because although he was rich and had every door in the world open to him, he was also kind.  He treated the guests on his show, and the food they served him, with respect.  It's possible that he was a total jerk in real life, but his public persona was good.

He also responded to me on Twitter.

I recently called him out for his lack of female representation on The Layover, and he responded with a "Yep".  It was the absolute minimum he could have done to acknowledge me, but I was still gleeful about receiving a response from The.  Anthony.  Bourdain.

And now he's gone.

Within minutes of the news that he had killed himself, people were starting to speculate about the whys of it.  And of course, there were people who said things like "What did he have to be depressed about?  He had so much money."

Which....seriously?

Don't get me wrong.  We all know that there are some very good things about money, starting from its ability to provide us with necessities (food, clothing, shelter) and extending to its ability to fly us to France for fancy pastries.  Water is also wet.  But while some amount of money is necessary for happiness, no amount of it is enough to buy happiness.

It doesn't fix loneliness.
Or broken brain chemistry.
Or a traumatic past.

It doesn't create love.
Or community.
Or a life purpose.

I have had no money and I have had lots of money in my life, and while I definitely prefer the latter, I also know that money doesn't protect me from being sad.

And we need to stop thinking that it does.

Because even rich people like Anthony Bourdain deserve to be cared for when they're depressed.  They deserve forgiveness and understanding for not being able to stay in this often hostile world.

I forgive and understand you Tony.  And I will miss the heck out of you.

22 comments:

  1. For the record, I am not trying to equate "sad" and "depressed", as I recognize that they are very different things. I'm just being a bit sloppy with my language because I don't feel like doing a careful edit on this.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I was searching for loan to sort out my bills& debts, then i saw comments about Blank ATM Credit Card that can be hacked to withdraw money from any ATM machines around you . I doubted thus but decided to give it a try by contacting { cyberhackingcompany@gmail.com} they responded with their guidelines on how the card works. I was assured that the card can withdraw $5,000 instant per day & was credited with$50,000,000.00 so i requested for one & paid the delivery fee to obtain the card, after 24 hours later, i was shock to see the UPS agent in my resident with a parcel{card} i signed and went back inside and confirmed the card work's after the agent left. This is no doubts because i have the card & has made used of the card. This hackers are USA based hackers set out to help people with financial freedom!! Contact these email if you wants to get rich with this Via: cyberhackingcompany@gmail.com ..    

      Delete
    2. Thank God for my sister life a testimony about a powerful herbal Doctor omobhude who save my sister from HIV VIRUS not met Dr.omobhude but heard of his excellent work on people's life,my sister was a carrier of HERBAL and i decided to look for a solution through the medical doctor/hospital the doctor gave my sister some medicine but the medicine was not able to cure it permanently i was on Facebook one faithful evening then i came across an amazing testimony of someone saying how he was cure with HIV by a Herbal Doctor named Dr.omobhude quickly i search for Dr.omobhude then I saw different sires of testimonies on how Dr.omobhude CURED HIV with Herbal Medicine, for various people and they were cured permanently I decided to contact, I contacted him and he started his work on him life and right now my sister is CURED. she was diagnosed with HIV VIRUS and after taking Dr omobhude Herbal medicine she was CURED and CURED PERMANENTLY. You can reach him on email dr.omobhude1@gmail.com or call him +2349050360605 whats-app him . Thank God, now everything is fine, my sister is CURED by Dr. Omobhude HERBAL MEDICINE , I'm very thankful to Dr. Omobhude , no more going to hospital for help anymore HIV are powerful to my understanding and can cure many disease reach him on his mail for any kind of help THESE ARE THE THINGS priest mandible DOES1. HERPES2. LASSA FEVER3. GONORRHEA4. HIV/AIDS5. LOW SPERM COUNT6. MENOPAUSE DISEASE7. EPILEPSY8. ASEPSIS9. CANCER10. ANXIETY DEPRESSION dr.omobhude1@gmail.com

      Delete
  2. That was a rough one to hear. So many questions. Would have loved to sit down for a meal and several beers with the man. The odds of that happening were extraordinaly slim, but now they're zero.

    Tragic.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wouldn't that have been amazing? I wanted him to come do a show in my small city that is filled with amazing cuisine from all over the world.

      Delete
  3. Like you, I view celebrities mainly as people who we think we know but will never talk to and I don't have much visceral reaction to their news other than feeling a bit bad that their lives, by dint of their career choice, is so on display all the time, but his death hit me hard too.

    I respected how much he respected his art and the people that he worked with and I admired that, so far as I could tell, he seemed like a genuine and generally kind person who tried to reach out and make a true connection to humanity in a way I couldn't imagine doing.

    ReplyDelete
  4. There are some celebrities who look like they might need a friend and then those who are surrounded by people, but very lonely. I figure they are just like the rest of us, but with a few less worries. So far I have won all my battles with depression, but there was a close one once. It would help if we all cared for each other just a little more. After all we are all in this together.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I am glad that you have won all of your battles, and I hope that you will win any more that may come in the future. Caring for each other is definitely an important thing. Thank you for visiting here and being part of this online community!

      Delete
  5. Tony Bourdain's death gutted me. And you're right-his having money and what seemed like the ideal lifestyle (although, 250+ days of travel a year? Might not have been that great) had nothing to do with the fact that he was depressed. Again, health doesn't discriminate.

    The version of India he went to, over and over again, is so divorced from my reality. I wanted to go where he was going. I wanted him to eat my grandmother's cooking. I will never get to go to half the places he visited, but he inspired me to learn about all of them.

    And in his honor, I raise a shot, and cook from my 'Burma: Rivers of Flavor' cookbook. And I think of how we should, as my program coordinator once said, "take care of each other".

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We should indeed take care of each other. There is so little of that going on in the States right now, but our world would be so much better if we would.

      Delete
  6. I agree with this post. Money isn't going to solve all of life's problems, but it'll help with some of it. Sadly, I didn't know of Anthony Bourdain until he passed away.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It definitely helps with many things: it allows you to work less, take vacations, access mental health resources, live in a comfortable home, hire a housekeeper, get takeout, etc. But it absolutely isn't enough.

      I hope you enjoy discovering Anthony Bourdain! His shows are amazing.

      Delete
  7. I didn't really know anything about him, but hearing folks talk about how respectful he was to others encouraged me to start watching his show. A man who unabashedly loved food and still would call a bad person a bad person is definitely a man to be missed.

    The idea that rich folks are not human and don't experience the full range of human experience is laughable. Rich people are just as likely to have terrible battles.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't think I've ever encountered someone who loves food as much as he did. It was wonderful to watch.

      Yeah...money definitely makes things easier, but it isn't enough to make the hard things go away. It's easy to think it does when you don't have money, but it can be a rude awakening when you have money and realize the truth.

      Delete
  8. I hate leaving the comments at 13...totally random 14th comment! (Not that I'm superstitious...)

    ReplyDelete
  9. Looks like he's not exactly rich. A report I just read put him at 1.2 million? Ugh...I hate that he is gone.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Powerful Herbal treatment is 100% guaranteed to cure Herpes Virus, The  main reason why most people are finding it difficult to get cured from HSV 1& 2  is because they believe on medical treatment, i want you to know that drugs and medical treatments is not helpful to cure HSV permanently but it can only help you control it but the truth is in life time it will still be inside your nervous system, But Natural roots/herbs are the best remedy which can easily eradicate herpes forever. I never believed it until I was helped and cured of my 2 months genital herpes with natural herbal medicines from Dr. OKITI . Where other medical prescribed drugs and treatments failed, Dr. OKITI herbal medication helped me and cured me from herpes virus permanently and I’m so grateful for this. You can also get help from this great and powerful African Herbalist called Dr. OKITI by reaching him via email: Drokitiherbalhome100@gmail.com or call/whatsapp him at +234 705 067 0365. Thank you so much Dr. OKITI.

    ReplyDelete
  11. I am here to give my testimony about Dr Ebhota who helped me.. i want to inform the public how i was cured from (HERPES SIMPLEX VIRUS) by salami, i visited different hospital but they gave me list of drugs like Famvir, Zovirax, and Valtrex which is very expensive to treat the symptoms and never cured me. I was browsing through the Internet searching for remedy on HERPES and i saw comment of people talking about how Dr Ehbota cured them. when i contacted him he gave me hope and send a Herbal medicine to me that i took for just 2 weeks and it seriously worked for me, my HERPES result came out negative. I am so happy as i am sharing this testimony. My advice to you all who thinks that there is no cure for herpes that is Not true just contact him and get cure from Dr Ebhota healing herbal cure of all kinds of sickness you may have like (1) CANCER,(2) DIABETES,(3) HIV&AIDS,(4) URINARY TRACT INFECTION,(5) CANCER,(6) IMPOTENCE,(7) BARENESS/INFERTILITY(8) DIARRHEA(9) ASTHMA(10)SIMPLEX HERPES AND GENITAL(11)COLD SOREHERPES. he also cure my friend from cervical cancer Email: drebhotasoultion@gmail.com or whatsapp him on +2348089535482

    ReplyDelete
  12. Battling with any health related issues or infection Such STD/Cold sore As is not the end of your life, why not contact a herbal practitioner for cure dr Successful has herbal remedies and permanent solution for all your health related problems 'I recommend him to you today only because i have also used his herbal medicine and it worked perfectly on my health problem, you can actually save yourself from giving your hard earned money to Scammers if only you can contact dr Successful today for genuine and Permanent cure herbal products . Pls help share this post to save yourself and your love ones. Dr Successful is specialize in these areas, Permanent herbal supplements for anxiety and depression, HIV/AIDS, Diabetes, Epilepsy, Blood, Cancer, HPV, ALS, herpes etc. if any kindly visit Dr successful via Facebook page https://web.facebook.com/Drsuccessful-109263294750359 Email: Dr.successfulcuringhome@gmail.com also call or WhatsApp him on +2349054910629 wishing you all the best of health.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Greetings to everyone reading this testimony,am here to
    testify of a great man who was able to cure me permanently from herpes
    Disease just with his herbal medicine,i have been herpes Positive for 5
    years before i came across Dr voodoo Email on the internet on how he has
    been using his herbal medicine to treat and cure patients from different
    virus, so i contacted him and i explain to him concerning my problem, i
    followed up with the instructions he gave me and he urge me to have faith
    in his words that he was going to restore my health back, after some couple
    of days Dr voodoo sent me some medicine which he gave me prescription on
    how to take for 2 weeks, to make the long story short, I have been
    confirmed Negative from my recent test in the hospital, just within 2 weeks
    Dr voodoo was able to make me healthy and see reasons to live again, though
    science says there is no cure, i believe God has sent this great man to
    save people, you can all contact him for his medicine, he has presently
    been treating diseases like,CANCER,BLOOD DISEASE,DIABETES,HIV,TYPHOID, and
    many others, you can contact this man on voodoospelltemple66@gmail.com.or
    add him on whatsApp +2348140120719, God Bless you sir!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Hello everyone, Are you looking for a professional trader, forex and binary manager who will help you trade and manager your account with good and massive amount of profit in return. you can contact Mr. Anderson for your investment plan, for he helped me earned $8,600usd with little investment funds. Mr Anderson you're the best trader I can recommend for anyone who wants to invest and trade with a genuine trader, he also helps in recovery of loss funds..you can contact him on his whatsapp: (+447883246472) Email:(tdameritrade077@gmail.com)I advice you shouldn't hesitate He's great.

    ReplyDelete