Hey wow...yes...I have a blog.
It turns out that when you take three weeks off of work, no matter how good a job you do of getting caught up before you leave, there will be a shit tonne* of work waiting for you on your return. And if you're sick for three weeks before you leave and therefore don't get done everything you want?
It has taken me a solid three weeks of hard work to get almost fully caught up, and I am now on call for two weeks, so I am falling further behind every day. So there (obviously) hasn't been a lot of blogging happening.
But there has been some dating. (Also a reason for the not blogging.)
Dating is one of my least favourite activities in the world. I have a few hangups about my appearance (thanks bad genetics and critical mother!), so putting photos out there for people to judge me by is not fun. (I'm sure I'm the only person who feels this way.) I also really don't like to meet new people. I do like when new people become old friends, but I do not like the anxiety of meeting someone new or the tedium of making small talk with someone I don't like.
So yeah. Introverts. Don't like dating. Who knew?
But then I met someone. Maybe not SOMEONE, someone. But someone interesting. Someone whom I have actually been seeing around my city for years, because my city is small and we both love the theatre. Someone who likes 90% of the same things as me. Someone whom I have now spent over 8 hours with and had virtually no moments of awkward silence with.
And it has been pretty wonderful, in a lot of ways. Except for my anxious brain. My anxious brain does not like to just relax and let things happen. It wants answers to everything. Now.
Are we compatible enough? Will my mother like her**? Will I break her heart? Will she break mine? Will I stay with her too long and regret time lost, like I always do?
It is, frankly, ridiculous. I haven't known her long enough to be wondering any of these things. All of these questions, and the many others that distract me constantly, can be answered with time. There is no rush.
I can just date.
So I am trying to go against my nature and do just that. Trying to slow down and let things unfold how they will.
We shall see.
*The metric equivalent of a shit ton.
**Probably not. But that's just my mother.